Friday, July 11


Hey, just want to write a letter to everyone, not because I am going to commit suicide (Choi!!) but just feel that I should. I have been, well, very fortunate to meet such wonderful people, yet I realize I haven’t thank them at all. And it’s not the last one I am going to write, I am pretty sure.

I think I will start first with the people I have passed by in my life, those I remember to date (11th July 2003), those that have made significant changes in my life…

To my primary school friends:

Oh man, it’s been so long so long… I don’t even think some of you might remember me. But I still do remember some of you. Not much though. I guess I owe you all an apology for always not wanting to join you for class gatherings, until it finally died away altogether. When I entered sec school, I had this desperate feeling that I thoroughly wanted to forget my primary school life. I was successful by the way, lost plenty of memories. I think I have a way of forgetting things I want to forget. Anyway, I know now we’ve all grown up, and are all going in different ways, towards your future. I wish you all good luck, hopefully that one day our roads might cross at some place in time.

To my secondary school friends:

Real grateful for whatever that you all have brought me through, whatever you all have given me. I think I truly appreciate the times I’ve spent with you guys, no matter whether in sec one or sec four. I know I have been a pest sometimes throughout these four years, and feel grateful for tolerating my nasty manners. Thanks for tell me I suck, and thanks for giving me chances to amend. Thanks for always consoling me when I’m down, thanks for being with me through difficulties. I can’t elaborate much; otherwise it’ll take four pages long. I can only say that much, but I really hope you understand that I am really grateful for having such a great bunch of people.

To my choir seniors:

Can’t express my heartfelt gratitude to my seniors, in which you all gave me such a wonderful introduction to choir, and truly made me feel at home. I cannot forget Yan Li, Rowena, Qing Lan, Cindy, and Mei Yei all those people that were always there to guide me through my sec one choir years. Regretfully I’ve only begun to treasure their presence in my mid sec 3 years, when they stepped down. I realized how lonely and lost it was without them, and yearn for their occasional visit. Without them, I feel choir was no longer a family.

To my choir friends:

Can tell I wasn’t very close to you people, the way I practically hogged the piano whenever I am around. I think I communicate better with the piano. Well, I think it can’t be help though. Never really spent a lot of time with you guys, but I know you all have always supported me in my performance. Thanks Evelyn Lim and Chia, Chair Ling, Yin Han, Hwee Hoon, Shi Ting… All these people… It was fun having you guys around.

To my choir juniors:

I don’t know, but I didn’t hang with you guys. At least, not a lot. But thanks for always respecting the way I am, and for knowing that I am actually older than you… Haha… Well, I can’t remember all of you, but Yu Pei, Joanne, all my alto juniors, made an impression on me. You guys will probably be stepping down for ‘O’s and ‘N’s soon, and wish you all good luck in whatever you do.

To Joanne:

Thanks for being a terrific junior, always being my sidekick, helping me with the pieces and even accompanying me at the piano. Remembered the times we were always scolded for talking too much and not paying attention to the conductor. Remembered the times we went out to buy clothes for the musical. Remembered how we trained for our pieces. Remembered how well you played. Well, those were the times. It’s been a great time having you around as my favourite junior. I know you are going to have your ‘O’s soon, just wishing you good luck with the papers and with someone… K?

To my adorable class, 4e1:

It’s been a great two years with all of you, especially the times we braved together, whether is it teacher’s admonishing, or in “troubled times”. Loved the way we bonded together, and loved the way we wanted to always stay together. Can’t believed we had to split in the end, and only wished we could stay on. But to each of his own, and we can’t afford to click on still. Thanks for the many class outings we had, and thanks for organizing such a fabulous event, and even thanks for being there and being supportive. Remembered Chu Zhen’s “Class!!” and “Pencil” and all those nicknames we gave each other. Grateful for all those class jokers who didn’t mind being laughed at and provided such joy. Very amazed at how we didn’t ostracize those who weren’t really accepted, and instead invited them to join in the fun. It’s all those little things that make our class worthy of remembrance, and worthy of reminiscence.

To my Gang, SBCA:

Still laughed over how we got our name, SBCA, Si Bei Chek Ark. Remembered you guys were the ones that helped me correct my uncountable faults. I still have some, old habits die hard you see. But really thankful for the action, that talk, that totally changed my life. Remembered our little nicknames like the first few ones, Sik Poi Moi (Yixin) and Tan Suey Pang (Guan). We later invented names like, Goh Suey Suey (Jia Ying), Zhuang Ke Ai (Chu Zhen), Tan Dui (Mei Shan), Peh Pak Puey (Su Fang), Chai Noi Noi (Hui Yee), Tan Kee Chui (Chew Hwee), and Tsan Mu Pui (Me). Oh man, the names were ridiculous, but the joke remains funny after so long. Couldn’t forget how we celebrated birthdays, ranging from lantern festival types, to Chomp Chomp dinners, to KTVs. Somehow, we managed to come out with plans for birthdays. Though we rarely had full attendance, we tried to come, knowing it’s a gathering of old times. Look forward to the next time we meet up for birthdays, it’s an old tradition of ours.

To the Student Council:

Well, to speak the truth, it’s the most irritating yet most alluring group of people. We can never seem to follow instructions properly, yet it’s the people that bond us together to become friends. It’s been a good three years working with people like Xin, Lynette, Jackson, Yan Hui and Ying Qin… all these people were the ones that kept the body going, no matter what. Couldn’t have done it without you guys. I’ll never forget how we got together to buy logistic materials, how we went all the way to Beach Road to search for the cheapest stuff we could find, how in the end we end up returning to the first store we went to because it happened to be the cheapest. Cannot help remembering how we managed the three-day orientation and the campfire night. Hectic we were, but more bonded we became. And camps were the best, allowing us to have heart-to-heart talks, play Truth or Dare, and cause all sorts of mischief. I am grateful for the teachers, Mr. Chee, Ms. Yak and Ms. Tan that actually gave us a position to talk in the interview and to voice our opinions. Appreciated the people that respected both Xin’s and my position as vice-president and president, and to know their limitations. Thankful for Mr. Lee, Ms. Ng and teachers that gave me a chance to become president, and to learn that I was actually a conceited bastard and a person that overestimates herself. Couldn’t ask for more, except to let us do it all over again.

To all my secondary school teachers:

Cannot thank enough for the support and encouragement I’ve received, and of course, all the scolding and admonishments. Made me realize all my faults and correct them. I know I’m still not a perfect being, but I try, and you were my first step. I guess I wouldn’t have been able to survive if not for the guidance. I couldn’t imagine how I would have turned out if I hadn’t been in this school. Thanks for setting hopes on me, so that I won’t be discouraged. But I’m sorry I have let you down, should I have failed to achieve what you aimed for me. I am not sad though, because I am happy the way things are laid out for me, and I want to make the best out of it. I am only sad because I’ve not done as well as you would have thought of me, but thank you for always trusting me that I can do it.

To Heli’s Gang (You should know who you are):

Flattered that you guys actually accept me as whom I am, and see me as one of your own. Flattered because you guys think of me whenever you guys go out, and flattered because I belong. Thanks for all the fun you guys brought, and thanks for being just you, because you are what I don’t have before. Truly enjoyed my time with all of you, especially the many different ways we try to make celebrating people’s birthday special. Thank you for making myself feel special in my own way, and thank you for always understanding and tolerating my faults. Chee Kean, You Cai, Aw Yong, Jing Lin, Ying Xian and Cass… Thanks for being just a special you.

To Heli:

You came about as a very special junior, one that’s very serious, but there’s always a side of you that’s more jovial. I didn’t know you through your brother, don’t worry, but never think you are always overshadowed by your brother, because you shine in your own way, a way your brother can never mask. In fact, there’s no likeness between you and your brother. Don’t always think you are useless, but I think I shan’t go on about that. Never think you can’t do it, because I believe you are stronger than succumbing to negative thoughts. Aim for whatever you want, and go for it. You have a very strong point, and that is your determination. Hold on to that, and never let go k?

To Vennie:

Never expect to actually become close friends with you. Had a very bad first impression of you though. Knew you first as a very bossy person in SC, and not one to be playing with. Didn’t let me do any work, except to stand there and act like an idiot, instead of helping out. Was quite pissed at you. Actually you still have the bossy character in you, almost always making others wait for you. That’s the habit that irritates the hell out of me. Try to be always on time k? I know I don’t act like a junior of yours, but that’s because I regard you not as a senior, but one of my buddies. Anyway, you always don’t have kind words for me, so hehe… ok, fine… Actually, don’t know how I came to know you, but actually immediately we clicked, which was special in a way that I don’t click immediately with people. Realized that we were pretty similar in some ways, yet totally different in some other. Remembered we only truly knew each other in sec 3, and became good friends in sec four. Didn’t forget you stood me up many times. I don’t blame you still, but I happen to not forget such things. You still have problems which Diana, but you never seem to take my advice, so I don’t want to tell you more anyway. Now and then, we still have clashes, but luckily, it wasn’t serious, just plain pissing. I really hope we could get along better. Well…

To Sin Guan:

Hey pal, my classmate, my buddy… I never know what would happen to me should I never meet you. The things that I can never anyone except you, the jokes you and I would make, the times we would sit together and chat like nobody’s business. Things like that can never be bought and only meeting you can I experience such. Laughed at the way you always pinpointed by bad habits, like coughing without covering my mouth, sneezing at practically nothing, and not to mention my etiquettes. People say how I could stand you, but actually they asked the wrong person. Perhaps they should ask you how you could stand me, sitting beside me for three long years. I think maybe we were very tolerant of each other, and very crazy when we get together. It’s the fun times that count. Almost forgot we once fought, and very childishly. But that was long time ago. Never wanted to fight again, but to look forward to having more fun times with you.

To Yixin:

Hey, my best friend, best buddy, best companion, best vice-president and best pal, it’s been the best knowing you, and I can’t ask for a better friend than you. You always seem to know what’s best for the situation, you have a calm mind and you know how it should be done. I truly admire your maturity and steadiness. Don’t say you aren’t, because it’s the truth, and everyone agrees. In all aspects, you outshine me, and I am not ashamed to say that, for I am proud to have a friend like you. I can’t remember you in primary school, but I have the clearest memories of you in secondary school. In sec one, I cannot imagine that you would be my best pal, for you and I were totally opposites. We grew to know each other better only in sec 2, but the friendship blossomed when we were in sec 3 and 4, the times we became president and vice-president. The irony is that we were no longer in the same class, yet we could become such friends now. The funny thing is, we compete against each other who could promote each other’s qualities better, but you know I always win anyway. Love the times we brawled on the sofas of the SL room, laughing as we tried to hold the other down. Somehow, you seem to always let me win, but I just knew you’d win, because you are actually the stronger one. And you never cease to comment on my speed of climbing stairs, but in fact you can run so much faster than me. We would race past our classes to the foyer’s stairs, but you know I am slower, so you’d slow down to wait for me. Somehow, I’ll always have a bit of whatever you are having for breakfast, like preparing two sets of breakfast in the mornings. You’ll always come around my table in the morning to remind me it’s duty day, and you’ll accompany me down. You like to go to the toilet in the mornings, and I’ll wait for you, stink or no stink. There are so many things I can say, that I remember. It floods endlessly. Within such a short period of time, we’ve accumulated so many things we’ve done. I don’t think I could have any other friend so special the way you are. Thank you for the way you are, and for the way you and I are friends.

Posted by Isabelle at 6:25 pm